Human After All
by RachaelLikesYaoi
Summary: "Eh, Nick," Ellis spoke softly, wincing as Nick tugged the bandage across his chest. "Why do yew hate me?" He whispered, trying to star at Nick but failing horribly. "I don't," Nick spoke quickly, tying up the bandage and looking at Ellis. "I hate how you're reckless." He looked back down, examining the damage one more time before deciding that it was all he could do. "I'm done."
1. Are You Sleeping?

A/N: Some Tish Happens

* * *

He was always the bad ass, always the killer. He was the one to always get the job done. Never felt any regret, never cared who it was. He just loved the kill, loved the look in the eyes of a dying person. He wasn't human, all that was human of him was gone. He didn't feel what humans felt. He smiled at the flames of a burning building. He smiled at the sight of cash after doing a job well done. He was consumed by greed.

And then he met the kid. That stupid kid, with his expressions and his stories. The kid with the well toned body, the one with the ever innocent face. The kind of face that usually made Nick gag. A face that brought up too many memories of his past. He hated that face, but at the same time, he could never look away from it.

* * *

Ellis blasted through, the sound of his shotgun echoing through his ears. Blood splattered across his face, touching his lips. He gagged a little, but continued to shoot. He needed to get somewhere safe, and soon. His stomach burned with pain as he thought of the witch tearing him open. He closed his eyes as hard as he could, trying not to think of the pain.

"Behind you!" Ellis heard the conman yell. He quickly turned as fast as he could, pulling out his guitar while he did so. He smashed the infected's head, the guitar strings finally breaking off. Ellis let out a breath, trying not to think of the pain. His eyesight was getting bleary. He rubbed them and went back to work on then zombies.

"Hey everybody, safe house!" He heard Coach yell from a little farther down the road. The words helped Ellis try even harder to make it out of the horde of zombies that were surrounding him. He crashed and shot though as much as he could. He trudged through. thinking to himself that it was about the end of him until he met the door, he ran in quickly, stumbling to the ground as Rochelle closed the door behind them.

"I got you honey," she spoke, pulling him up to his feet. "Nick, use your health kit on him."

"Why should I, he's the reason we took so long to get here." Nick snarled, looking straight into his deep blue eyes. He looked away quickly as he watched Ellis wince.

"Now, Nick, Ellis has helped you out on so many occasions. Give. Him. Your. Health. Kit." Rochelle murmured to him, causing him to roll his eyes. He walked over to Ellis pulling out his health pack. Ellis grimaced and Rochelle and Coach walked out of the room to explore the safe house some more.

Nick worked slowly, lifting up Ellis' shirt, looking at the damage the witch had dealt him. Ellis exhaled and slopped over onto Nick. Nick's heart slightly raced.

"You're gonna need to lay down, if I'm gonna fix you up." He let Ellis lay down on one of the tables, lifting up his shirt to reveal the gash across his stomach. They sat there in total silence as Nick slowly fixed Ellis up.

"Eh, Nick," Ellis spoke softly, wincing as Nick tugged the bandage across his chest. "Why do yew hate me?" He whispered, trying to star at Nick but failing horribly.

"I don't," Nick spoke quickly, tying up the bandage and looking at Ellis. "I hate how you're reckless." He looked back down, examining the damage one more time before deciding that it was all he could do. "I'm done." He pulled back down Ellis' shirt and turned to walk away.

"Nick," Ellis spoke from behind Nick. He turned slowly to see the hick slowly walking towards him with all that he could. "Thank you." He stared up into the conman's eyes, making him think more things he probably shouldn't. The hick smiled weakly and stood up in front of him, standing strong even though his body was so sore.

It happened quickly and Nick almost thought it didn't happen but the warm presence on his lips told him it did. Quickly Ellis pressed his lips against Nick's standing on his tip toes, wrapping his arms around Nick's neck. The kiss was short and sort of like a peck but Nick defiantly wanted more. But just as the moment happened it was gone. Nick opened his eyes to see that Ellis had turned to start walking towards were Coach and Rochelle wondered too. Nick caught up to him with no trouble considering Ellis' injuries. He grabbed Ellis' wrist and spun him around.

"Did I say Dr. Nick was done?" He whispered, pulling Ellis closer to him, wrapping his arms's around Ellis' waist. He kissed the hick's lips roughly, his chapped lips slammed up against them. He loved how soft they were, almost like a woman's Nick could have sworn to anyone before he met Ellis that he was straight, but since he saw those beautiful blue eyes he wasn't so sure anymore. He kissed harder as Ellis wrapped his arms around the conman's neck. He smiled into the kiss. They slammed their bodies harder against each other. Nick licked Ellis' mouth, signaling the hick to open his mouth. He did so and their tongues interacted and pursued each other causing Nick to become even more hot. _Are you sure you should be doing this? After all, you are a terrible man and he is so innocent._ Nick tried his best to shut out the thoughts, to shut out that terrible voice, the one that made him crack.

Ellis pulled away from him, his eyes glazed over. "Well then Doctor,' he whispered, kissing the conman's lips again. He grabbed tuffs of Nick's hair, pulling them slightly. Nick let out a moan, filling Ellis' body with electricity. He broke the kiss looking into Nick's eyes. "It's a shame this is a dream," he whispered into Nick's ear. Nick opened his eyes and Ellis was gone, what filled his place was cold sweat and a dark room. He looked around, realizing he had actually fallen asleep in this shit hole. Right next to him laid the Hick, snoring away, slightly shivering.

Nick let out a small smile and took off his jacket, laying it over the boy. "Good night kid." He looked at the wall and laid back down.

* * *

"Nick," He heard Ellis moan. Ellis arched his back, gasping in pleasure. A smile formed across the conman's face. He kissed the hick's neck, knawing on the flesh, causing the hick to let out another moan. Ellis gripped his back tighter, tearing into his skin. He whispered into Nick's ear. "Now this is a good dream." Nick pulled away and Ellis weakly smiled at him, his face soaked with sweat.

"What?" Nick spoke kissing Ellis again. 'So this is another dream?' Ellis pulled away from him.

"But I could be dreaming this too." Ellis leaned his face to touch Nick's lips, licking them, edging the conman to continue. He did, thrusting deep into Ellis' bum. Ellis moaned again not caring if Coach and Rochelle heard him. Ellis clawed down the conman's back, rolling his hips. Nick kissed his lips, gently flicking his tongue onto the hick's mouth. He moved Ellis' legs so that they were on top of his shoulders. Ellis bit the bottom of Nick's lips, causing him to go over the edge. He thrusted again, biting Ellis' neck. He pulled out of Ellis and the hick looked at him pleadingly. The conman trailed down the hick stomach, kissing and sucking until he came across Ellis' member. He licked it slightly and Ellis moaned as loud as he possibly could, sweat streaming down his face.

"Ah, Neek," he murmured. "Don-," he never finished his statement as Nick put the hick's member in his mouth. The hick moaned in pleasure, bucking his member further into Nick's mouth. The boy grabbed tuffs of the conman's hair and pulled at it, practically ripping the man's hair out. He squirmed and gasped, trying not to be loud, even though he knew he already was. Nick continued his job, taking Ellis' member in full, relishing at the saltiness of it. A smile etched on his face as he worked Ellis to the edge. Nick had never done this before, but he could tell that Ellis was enjoying it very much. He released Ellis and looked at him, his eyes completely glazed over. "Why, why did yuu stop," he murmured out, looking Nick in the eyes. Nick thrusted back in, getting closer to Ellis' face.

"I wanna see your expression," Nick spoke, sucking on Ellis' neck. The hick gasped, trying not to over exaggerate the fact that he couldn't take much more of this amazingness. He never saw himself as a gay man, well, unless Keith was around. but Kieth was gone. Ellis moaned again as he released, and Nick was staring at him watching his expression. He kissed the hick's lips, playing joyfully with his tongue. He was thrusting quicker and quicker inside of Ellis, trying his hardest to near his end, but for some reason it just wasn't happening. He grunted and lifted Ellis so that he was on his lap. Ellis wrapped his arms around Nick's neck, gasping harder, biting Nick's neck. "I'm sorry Ell," He choked out, trying to concentrate. He kissed the Hick's jawline, his neck, his chest. He stopped to look at his eyes and Ellis looked back.

"What are you doing?" He looked at Nick with big eyes, Nick was utterly confused. He closed his eyes, trying to think of what Ellis wanted to hear.

"I'm," he opened his eyes to see and even more, full clothed Ellis laying under him, his face flushed and looking innocent. Nick was hovering over top of him, his face inches from Ellis'.

"Nick, what are you doing?" Ellis murmured looking away, his blush spreading across his face and down his neck.

"I, uh, I don't really know," He choked out, looking at the hick. "Uh, sorry kid." He turned over and laid on his back, trying to figure out why he just had a dream of him and Ellis, uh, doing stuff.

"Nick," he heard Ellis murmur again.

"What kid," he whispered, utterly embarrassed of himself.

"I," He stuttered, trying to think of the right words. "I woun't of minded if yuu, uh." Nick turned around to face Ellis. Ellis looked away again, at the ceiling. "Yuu could've, uh, continued, if yuu, uh wanted to." He stared at Nick, slowly moving his hand to touch Nick's chest. "I woun't mind a' all." He smiled weakly and scooted closer to Nick. Nick couldn't believe what he was hearing, a grown man being absolutely flustered about being with another man. _You remember when I used to be flustered. _Nick tried to not answer the voice in his head. "I-," Nick smacked his lips up against the hick's, his real lips so much better than the ones in his dreams. He gripped the hick's cheeks, pulling him against his body. _You won't forget about me just by kissing that boy._

A knock on the door interrupted their moment.

"Ellis and Nick, we gotta get going if we wanna be at the mall by evening," Rochelle whispered slightly cracking the door open. Ellis pushed Nick, sending him off the bed.

"Ow, you stupid hick," he yelled, rubbing his now aching head. "What the hell was that for?"

"Rochelle scared me," Ellis spoke, his voice strong and not at all like it was before.

"Yeah, well don't do it again you idiot," Nick hissed back as Rochelle left the room.

"What the hell Nick?" Ellis choked, hurt that Nick called him an idiot. Did Nick just want him for the satisfaction of being intimate with someone, is that all Ellis was? His thoughts were interrupted by Nick's lips slapping against his. The boys eyes closed and he wrapped his arms around the conman. Nick broke the kiss.

"Gotta keep up appearances kid," He whispered before leaving Ellis by himself.

* * *

Alright, so this is my first Yaoi type thing. I hope I did good, please review, I need some insight.


	2. Face to Face

**************PLEASE READ AUTHOR'S NOTE!**************

A/N: So I changed some stuff up in the first chapter, please read. I made a sort of different approach, one that made Nick more like a monster, and more mysterious.

* * *

The zombies roared, surrounding the survivors, causing Rochelle to yell out, "They just never give up do they?" No shit Rochelle, they're zombies. The ran toward the safe room, trying their best not to die. Nick was trying to carry Ellis along, since Ellis had been smoked and was looking pretty bad. He would be okay once they got into the safe room. Right? Of course. Ellis was a strong man. That was what Nick liked about him. The stomping echoed in the safe room as they all tumbled inside. Coach slammed the door shut as Ellis choked out blood and fell to the ground.

"Hey kid," Nick said, grabbing Ellis' almost broken body. Ellis smiled weakly and looked up at Nick. "Hey, you okay? You can rest now. We're safe." Coach and Rochell wondered into a different room, probably looking for food. "Dr. Nick'll fix you up." A smile spread across Ellis' face, but then he winced again and held his stomach. Nick's smile broke and he grabbed the closest health pack he could find. He helped Ellis undress and looked about the damage. It didn't look too bad, but then again, Nick wasn't a registered practitioner. He fixed the damage he could and he could hear Ellis let out a sigh of relief.

"Thanks partner," Ellis whispered, still grabbing his stomach. He smiled weakly, making the conman smile back. The conman slightly caressed the hicks cheek, that is until Rochelle and Coach walked back in.

"Is the kid gonna be okay?" Coach said, tossing them a can of beans. Ellis nodded and tried his best to stand up. Nick helped him to the bedroom.

"I'm gonna catch some zs, not really hungry right now."

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna hit the hay too," Nick bellowd as they walked into the room. He laid Ellis down on the bed, trying not to make the hick hurt anymore. "There has to be something I could do, I hate seeing you hurt." Nick touched the hick's cheek again. For some reason he was so drawn to this person, he didn't know why. He just wanted to have the boy forever. He someone wondered how he could even feel like that. Even after all the things he's done; murder, greed, all the things that make someone a monster. He was happy the apocalypse started. That just meant he didn't have to be careful, he could just go about his usual business. What he didn't get at first was that in an apocalypse the mafia kind of dies off too. _Remember when I died? You didn't even cry. _Nick heard the voice in his head. The one that he used to love, the soft tone, the hidden sexiness to it. _You didn't even have a funeral. _

"There is something you could do," Ellis said, pulling Nick down to meet his face. Nick stared into those captivating blue eyes. He kissed Ellis' lips. trying his hardest to not hurt the adorable hick. The hick grabbed the back of the conman's head, grabbing tufts of hair. Nick kissed harder, deciding that this couldn't hurt the hick. Their tongues collided and played with eachother, expressing their need for eachother. The conman could feel Ellis move from underneath him. He could feel the hick wince with the movement.

"Are you okay El?" Nick questioned breaking the kiss. He looked into the hick's eyes.

"I jus, I need yew Nick," He whispered, slamming his lips against the conman's. Nick's heart raced. God this kid put him on edge. He slowly grabbed the kid's back, pulling his body against his own. He heard Ellis murmur in pain but he continued to kiss the conman. Ellis wrapped his hands around Nick's neck, trying his best not to care about the pain. It was working for the most part. The kissing was helping him, but he wanted more. But he knew that his body just couldn't take it. Nick broke the kiss and tugged at the kid's shirt. Nick didn't even know why the hick cared about that shirt so much, he just knew that he couldn't stand Ellis wearing it for too much longer. He pulled the hick's shirt off slowly, trying his best not to hurt him. The hick winced but tried to hide it was a smile. The conman touched the hick's chest, caressing the bandage that was across his stomach, he smiled weakly. He kissed the hick's neck, biting it softly. Ellis let out a small squeak and wiggled a little. Nick kissed down Ellis' chest, kissing every scar that was encountered. Ellis moaned slightly, trying not to let Nick know how amazing it felt for someone so special to him to be kissing every part of his exposed skin. Nick smiled weakly, trying not to think of the overwhelming grief that truly drowned him.

_It's your fault that he's hurt. _Nick winced, he didn't want to think about the fact that he practically made the smoker attack the kid. _If you hadn't been so reckless, he wouldn't be hurt. _Nick looked up at the boy, he was not deserving of someone who looked so innocent, so good. He knew he was evil, he knew he didn't deserve this. _You're a monster remember? _He shook his head kissed the kid's lips again, shutting out the voice in his head.

"Nick?" Ellis murmred, breaking their kiss. "Is sumtin wrong?" He looked into the boys eyes, resorting to his best poker face. The smiled a little. "I guess not."

"I'm just tired Ell." Nick smiled again, laying down beside the hick, wrapping his arms around him.

"Good night Nick."

"Night kid." _You'll fuck up eventually, whether it's you or him. You're a monster._

But, so badly did he want to be considered a human.


	3. Make Love

A/N

I just figured I would tell you that I will be putting this story on hiatus until further notice. I'm sorry to do that but I just can't find the right words to finish this chapter. It will be the last chapter but I just can't figure it out. I will finish the sex scene and then it may be the end of it. But here's what I have so far. I'm so sorry to dissapoint you so much.

* * *

Nick shoved Ellis into the room, this was the first night since they had expressed their feelings for each other that Ellis or Nick weren't hurt. Nick was done waiting for this. He shoved Ellis onto the bed, not caring about the fact that Coach and Rochelle were in the other room trying to sleep. He shut the voice out of his head as hard as he could. But no matter what he kept hearing that velvet soft, sexy voice. _Are you going to think about me the entire time you have sex with him? If you do that just means you want sex. _But Nick didn't want sex, he just wanted Ellis. Nick looked into the hick's crystal blue eyes. He shoved his lips up against the boys, and Ellis responded by wrapping his arms around the conman's neck.

"Nick," Ellis murmured in between kisses. Nick broke the kiss and looked at the hick, only it wasn't Ellis he was seeing, it was Vera. "What's wrong?" Vera clicked her head to the side, her face pale, her eyes bulging out of her head, the blonde hair that he had come to love was wet and sprawled about. She opened her mouth as if to say something but only water came out. Nick's eyes widened. He instantly got up and turned off the bed. His face in his hands.

"I killed her," Nick murmured, trying to put his thoughts together. He stood up and paced around the room. "I, I didn-"

"Nick, what is wrong?" Ellis spoke louder, standing up to stand in front of Nick. He grabbed Nick's shoulders, trying his best to look into Nick's eyes. "Who did you kill?"

"Vera," Nick's face broke. "Oh god I killed her, she was, dammit!" Nick pushed Ellis away and turned away from him. "I, I didn't even have a funeral for her. Did you know that?" Nick turned to face Ellis. "All I did was bury her with the rest of the crooks I had been killing, like she was one of them."

"Nick, who is Vera?" Ellis said again, grabbing Nick's hand. Nick looked down at the boy, taking in his dazzling blue eyes. The ones that made him breathless from the get go. He ponders if he should tell Ellis who she was. To tell him that she was this amazing girl, that she was perfect in every form of the word. That she died because of Nick's recklessness. That she died because he was a fool. "Nick, tell me."

"Vera was," Nick thought of how to describe her. Should he say that she was perfect and that he had loved her with all his might, that he almost quit the family business for her? Should he tell the kid that he got her killed because he decided to leave her home alone for once, thinking no one was after him."Vera was a girl who used to be mine." _But then you got careless and got me killed. _"Nick sat down on the bed and Ellis sat next to him, still grasping Nick's hand. "She was beautiful and perfect. I met her when I was on a job." _And you fell in love and couldn't keep your hands off of me. _"I really liked her, we moved in together, had a lot of fun, but I was still in the business and I couldn't tell her about what I really did. I went to do a job one day, not thinking anyone could follow my tracks but I was wrong. The second I got back to the house I knew something was wrong." Nick down at his hands that were intertwined with the hick's. "She used to greet me at the door the second she heard the door opening, and when I came home that night she didn't." Nick could feel tears brimming his eyes, but he didn't dare cry. "She was taking a bath, getting ready for our date of the evening, she probably didn't hear the crooks come in when they did and she ended up being drowned in the tub." Nick looked at Ellis, his eyes brimming with tears. "If I had just given up on the money, she would still be alive."

"Nick," Ellis whispered, touching the conman's cheek. "What happened to Vera is not your fault. Just because you left her alone and were in the business doesn't mean they wouldn't have came after her even if you left. If you had been there you would probably be gone too." Ellis leaned in and touched the conman's lips with his own. The gesture made Nick's body flare on fire, to momentarily forget the fact that he was just talking about the one woman he ever let into his life. The hick licked the conman's lips while moving his hand to grab tuffs of Nick's hair. Nick wrapped his arms around the boy, letting their tongues intertwine and play with each other. the hick moaned sofly against Nick, causing his mouth to vibrate. Nick broke the kiss, looking into Ellis' eyes. He didn't say anything, all he did was kiss Ellis' neck, and nibble on it slightly causing Ellis to arch his back and press his chest harder agasint the conman's. Nick pushed them down onto the bed so that he was hovering over top of the kid. He kissed him harder and let his hands explore the underneath of Ellis' shirt. His body was cold and still had days old bandages from the last time he had gotten hurt. Ellis broke the kiss and stared into Nick's brown lidded eyes. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Ellis whispered as Nick pinched one of his nipples, causing Ellis to let out a small squeak.

"Of course I am," Nick murmured moving his hands to lift up Ellis' shirt. His stared at the boy's chest, mesmerized by a the bruises and scars that now etched his body. He pulled off Ellis' shirt and kissed the somehow soft flesh. Ellis moaned slightly and ran his fingers through Nick's somewhat short hair.

To be continued.


End file.
